I propose a toast...

... to GAMBRINUS the lord of booze!

Gentlemen, to the lager bus!

Billionhair

What the hell is going on with Donald Trumps hair? How can it be combed forwards and backwards at the same time???!!!!

I watched the Apprentice USA last night.

rubbish like this just isn't worth the photons emitted from my CRT

i'm watching the one show on bbc 1. i've had the misfortune to catch this programme a couple of times now, and the concept has been the same each time i've seen it:

1) tv 'naturalist' kate humble has a look at some animals around the british isles (frankly i've had enough of that with the ubiquitous 'animal park' -- a show without any point, and it seems, without end)

2) some 'trendy' accountant or finance expert telling us we're borrowing too much, and how to save money on credit cards.

3) some rubbish about the latest health trend

4) some mind-numbing-time-filling-thoughtless-unintelligent chit-chat between the presenters -- more interested in their own wise cracks than any 'guest' they happen to have on the couch.

in the style of points of view: why oh why oh why oh why do we have to put up (and pay!) for this crap?

Cramp Confusion

I'm off to the gym again tonight. I got really bad cramp last time which as I thought can be due to lack of salt. I've been avoiding salt now for a year or so after the doctor told me my blood pressure was too high. Perhaps now I'm exercising regularly I need to replace the lost salts. This could be a delicate balance. Any suggestions?

thoughts

does any one else think that the latest muse song sounds like the theme tune to howard's way?

crumbs, carrots!!

thank cosgrove hall! dangermouse is coming back!

can it be 25 years? i love 1981!

here is the wikipedia entry

space elevator pah!

Read an article about space elevators in New Scientist. Its basically a piece of very strong string attached to a geostationary satellite in orbit. You have a machine that climbs up the string carrying a payload into space. The main problems are that as yet no one can make a string strong enough (out of carbon nano tubes etc) and no one can make a climbing machine that can go all the way up just powered by lasers from the ground. Also geostationary orbit is 36000 km above the earth so we're gonna need a long piece of string.

I thought I'd have a go at my own way of getting into space (how hard can it be). I started by doing what they did - putting the word 'space' in front of words you would find in a department store: space audio visual dept (nope), space lingerie dept (nope), space escalator!!!!!

Ah ha so the plan is a space escalator (I'm copyrighting this by the way NASA). It doesn't require geostationary orbit, it just need to get to low earth orbit (LEO) - according to wikipedia "the commonly accepted definition for LEO is between 200 - 2000 km"

OK lets go for 200km cos it sounds a bit easier.
Assuming our escalator is at 45 degrees cos it sounds reasonable. We need a height of 200km and using a bit of trigonometry triangle type stuff we get a base of 200km and a hypoteneuse (staircase) of root 2 times 200km = 282.8km. It almost sounds too easy. You could stick loads of stuff up there one after the other on consecutive steps of the moving staircase!

Weigh Day

Its tuesday, its weigh in day. I've now been to the gym 3 times a week for 2 and a half weeks. Am I any lighter? No, am I bugger but I haven't gained any weight either:

15st 9lbs again

Maybe this is a plateau before the big drop :)

the results

no cheese sandwich.

either:

(a) my future self failed to get to have a go on the time machine (perhaps it is too expensive, belongs to the military/space corps, etc.)

(b) time travel is not possible (at least within the next ~50 years or so)

(c) cheese sanwiches are no more in the future (bummer!)

(d) my future self forgot about this blog in the intervening years (damn my forgetful self).

an elegant proof of why time travel will not be possible in my life-time

here is an elegant proof of why time travel will not be possible in my life-time:

1) if time-travel becomes possible in the future (within my life-time), i will do my utmost to ensure i get to have a go on the machine

2) once in the machine i will set the time and location to 1635, ten minutes from now, back here in 311.

3) once back here, i will leave a marker (say a cheese sandwich) on the desk

4) thus, if in ten minutes a cheese sandwich does not appear, we can be sure that they will not have invented time travel within my life time.

i'll let you know the results in a minute.

trip to the library

me and john were going to take a visit to the can machine, but on the information from norris that there wasn't much in it, we decided to take a trip to the library shop. i told john that they did draught coke there. he was incredulous. i assured him it was true. when we got there the man said 'sorry lads, the machine is being cleaned'. we resorted to the can machine in the shop. i had a lilt and john had a fanta. totally tropical.

Stephen Robert "Steve" Irwin (1962 - 2006)

Thats right in the early hours of the morning Steve was killed by a stingray.

He's gone to wrestle the big crocodile in the sky.

The world has lost another hero.